In Charge, but not too Controlling…
Most of us operate as if this equation has some truth to it. Fully or, at least, partially:
Intentionality = good
Inflexibility = bad
…I’ve been considering the difference between these two words and whether, even though I feel as if I go through life with some intentionality (at least some of the time!), I’m not really as ‘in charge’ as I think I am.
And, I’m also questioning whether it’s simply my ego fooling me that I have any control whatsoever.
Because, when it comes down to it, life seems to be a series of randomly, guided events.
Here’s what this looks like to me right now…
Gotta Have a Purpose, Right?
It looks as if intentionality is good. (or, it’s probably more true to say that it can look as if…)
If we have a purpose, a direction, a vision, we’ll know where we’re going and we’ll be able to get there. And that’s good, right? (and, surely, what’s at the heart of the search for clarity that shows up for some of us.)
Yet, it also looks as if inflexibility is bad. Inflexibility equates to rigidity; a refusal to consider, or even see, other perspectives and opportunities, a lack of willingness to enter into discussion.
So how can we retain intentionality and not allow it to get in the way of us feeling fulfilled and satisfied in our lives?
How it Works…
There’s really only one answer to this question and, for me, it comes from knowing that my intentionality has nothing to do with where I’m going to end up.
It’s a throw of the dice; it’s a step forward; it’s like saying
Yeah, I’m gonna join the game, not sit on the sidelines.
The rest is up to whatever it is that’s guiding my life.
Intentionality is all very well, as long as I know enough to not let it get in the way of life.
I dove a little deeper with this topic in a recent audio (it’s #5 of 5 if you want to go straight to this topic).
I’d be curious to know what your view is on this.
Do you think that having a purpose, or some intentionality as I’ve called it, is essential to having a wonderful life? Is it merely interesting, and diverting? Or could it actually inhibit us from having a wonderful life?
About the author
Cathy Presland is an expert in human-centred leadership and transformative change. She has more than two decades of experience in government and international organisations and her focus as a coach is to support impact-driven individuals and organisations to improve their performance, leadership and peace of mind to enable them to make more of a difference with the work they do.